(n) A flat, cracker-like, yeast-free “bread” that Jews eat during Passover in honour of Moses and the Jews who fled Egypt in such a hurry that they couldn’t allow time for their bread to rise. During Passover, any food that contains grains and is allowed to ferment or rise is dubbed “chametz” (meaning “leavened”), and is off-limits for the duration of the holiday. This includes but is not limited to bread, pasta, cake, beer, cookies; basically everything worth eating. This is a very long week for a people who have such a committed relationship with their carbs. Matzah is very bland and dry. We survive by covering this glorified cardboard with copious amounts of butter and chocolate, or whatever we have on hand that’s schmearable.